


James Potter's Earth Logic

by Nimori



Category: Harry Potter - Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-04-17
Updated: 2010-04-17
Packaged: 2017-10-09 00:20:02
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/80983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nimori/pseuds/Nimori
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>James has questions. James has answers. Then they have sex.</p>
            </blockquote>





	James Potter's Earth Logic

"Potter!" McGonagall's voice cut through the excited chatter that rose in the wake of the smoke.

It wasn't often James miscast a spell, and when he did it was grand entertainment (and usually caused by Sirius throwing things), but even the Marauders had to admit James had outdone himself that day. Sirius was applauding, Remus was shaking his head -- thereby concealing a grin with his hair -- and Peter had dropped all his half-transfigured thumbtacks on the floor to stare in open-mouthed wonder.

James tried not to preen too obviously, and gave himself a hand up.

"Thanks," said the other him.

"Don't mention it," he answered himself, and they both bowed to Sirius, who had begun shouting "Encore!"

"Back to work, Black," McGonagall said. "And Potter, to the hospital wing at once, both of you, and ask Madam Pomfrey to put you back together."

"Aye aye, ma capitaine!" James saluted and followed himself out.

"Have to remember how we did that," one of him said once they were in the corridor.

"Excellent skiving mechanism." They both stuffed their hands in their pockets as they ambled towards the hospital wing. "And the class needed some excitement anyway. Thumbtacks to cockroaches, really! First year stuff."

"I agree, old bean. Say--" He stuck out an arm to halt the other him, but he'd already stopped. They grinned at each other. "No hurry."

"'At once' is such a subjective term."

They had a bit of a fight over which had to return to class, but James won in the end, and spent a productive afternoon hexing the Slytherin house point counter to spew slime over passing members of its house, while James sat in History of Magic and threw things at Sirius.

*****

None of their mates fell for the trick they planned in the common room after dinner; the Marauders seemed to take it for granted that James hadn't gone to the hospital wing as ordered.

Sirius dragged them all upstairs, salivating at the dozen pranks he had envisioned all afternoon while dodging the Every-Flavour Beans James flicked at him, and both of James remembered why they loved Sirius so much.

"Have to give McG some time to forget about it before it's really useful, but Prongs!" Sirius grabbed the first one of him through the door and twirled him around. "Oh, Prongs, this is going to be fantastic, and we are going to make Filch's poor little head explode, and he won't know who's coming or going. Flawless alibis! Do you know how long I've dreamed of this? Prongs, tell me you remember how you did it, Prongs, tell me--"

The Jameses laughed, and one of him held Sirius down to keep him from hyperventilating.

"I," the other of him announced, "have a plan."

"Of course you do," Remus said, and put away his books for later.

They had him well trained.

*****

By the time James had finished scrubbing off the last of the dungbomb Peter had, upon forgetting there were five of them now, whipped at his head, the other him had taken over their bed as well as their favourite pair of pyjamas. He donned the second-favourite, and elbowed his own long limbs out of the way, already planning tomorrow's pranks.

It wasn't until he had snuggled in close in the narrow bed that it occurred to him to find the tight fit -- and his lack of objection to it -- awkward. He wondered if this was how Fabian and Gideon felt all the time. He'd always wanted a brother. A twin would have been perfect, but an ordinary little brother would do (he'd seen Sirius with Regulus and didn't think anyone in their right mind would want an _older_ brother). Two of himself was better than twins even, or so he imagined, having no comparison.

"Hey," one of him whispered.

"'S for horses."

"Bugger off. Remember last month? The magazine we found in Snivelly's trunk?"

They cast a simultaneous silencing charm, and one of him sat up.

"Yeah?"

"Well." The other licked his lip.

"Good thinking!"

"No better time to find out."

"Can't trust Sirius with something like this."

"_'Course_ not! He'd never _tell_\--"

"But he'd never let us forget, the bastard."

"And wanking's no good for finding out, not even with, you know, fingers."

James nodded, completely in agreement with himself. "No different than tossing off, even with fingers. It's not all..."

They looked at each other. Hard muscles and sharp angles and flat chests, they wanted to say, but they already knew. This was the only safe way to try it, the only way to find out for sure if all those things in the magazine and the way they made him feel meant he was... that. Like Snivellus.

The thought was too much to bear, and one of him quirked his lips.

"Oh James, take me now, you sexy beast!"

They both cracked up, but it made them squirm all the same, and there really wasn't room for squirming in their bed. One James turned a bit, so the squirming was at least productive, and the other thought "To hell with it," and kissed himself.

After a few seconds, they broke apart, and one James looked at the other with dismay. "We need to work on that."

"Yeah."

"Practice a bit?"

"Okay."

They kissed again, and after several minutes of constructive criticism, worked out a much better technique.

"Wow," James said, resting his head on an arm. "Evans won't be able to resist us."

"No wonder she hexed us last time we kissed her."

James felt he ought to point out that their last kiss with Evans had been the result of a trick, and that was probably why she'd gone for her wand. The other him had started poking around inside his pyjama bottoms though, so he left off.

James's hand wasn't scary like Felicia's, with its long red nails, or Gwen with her numerous rings. He could trust himself not to pull too hard, or bring him to the edge and back out. He rumbled a happy noise, and grinned to hear an answering rumble from the chest under his ear.

The other James pulled out his cock with his free hand, and James took the hint. The narrow bed left them little room, and they bumped together, at first by accident and then on purpose as one of him rubbed the heads together.

It felt far too good, and anxiety broke through the pleasure. Would he still like Evans after? Or would the part of him that might be _that_ take over and squash the way he felt about her?

Privately, he could admit that might be less hazardous to his health. Evans was a fast draw with the wand.

"How should we do this?" James's voice was rough, and he liked it.

Still... "I'm not taking it like a girl."

"Of course not. How about you on top, with me in you?"

Neither could see anything wrong with that. Experimentation with fingers had taught him hand lotion had more than two uses, so one of him retrieved the mostly empty bottle from under the mattress and slicked up his cock. The other James crawled on top, straddling his midsection. It didn't matter what went where, because it all belonged to him. If only all sex could be so simple!

"Ready?" James asked, hands on James's hips.

"Yeah." He sank down, just a bit, and squirmed at the odd sensation. James tugged him closer, and the sensation made up its mind to be pain.

"Ow," said one of him.

"Does it hurt?" asked the other. "'Cause it's brilliant from this end. Go down a little more?"

"No. Let me think." James leaned forward, slipping free. The other him pouted, and took hold of his cock to rub it against James's hole -- just as a reminder. "I think the finger thing first would help."

"Brilliant," James said, and slipped his fingers inside.

James sucked in a sharp breath. It felt very different to not be controlling the movements, and despite himself he leaned ever farther forward, until they were chest-to-chest, and pushed his arse back. His own clever fingers found that little spot he'd become addicted to over the last month and teased it until he thought he'd spill between their bellies. He bit his lip.

James watched his face enviously. "We'd better remember everything when Pomfrey puts us back together."

"I'm sure we will." He sat up. "All right, I think I'm ready."

James removed his fingers at once and poised his cock once more. "I'll let you do it," he said, feeling himself quite generous. The other him eased himself onto his cock. After a bout of swearing and a mild course correction, the wet heat of his own body enveloped him.

Fucking brilliant, they both thought.

One of him gave an experimental wriggle and the other gasped, and forget pranks, _everyone_ should have two of themselves.

He wriggled again, and that melted into rocking, and then thrusting, one of him squeezing his thighs while the other clutched the headboard with one hand and stroked his prick with the other. The stinging pain grew, but so did the pleasure and excitement and the formless urge to just fuck, and fuck hard.

One of him, the one on top, let go of his cock to gain more leverage, and James took over without a word. He could feel the explosion about to happen, drawing closer with every downstroke of the other him's hips, a hot vise milking him.

"Can't last," he gasped, his strokes faltering. His eyes rolled back under his fluttering lashes and everything went suddenly slicker. James slammed his arse down hard and took over fisting his prick while the other him voiced an appalling series of groans, moans, and whimpers.

He didn't sound like that when he came, did he?

He forgot about embarrassing noises as his nerves took fire. No return now. He clenched his cheeks to hold on to the fading feel of hardness inside him, his hand a blur from the wrist on, and cried out as long strings of pearly come shot out over James's chest.

He dropped forward, hands on the bed to hold himself up, panting. The other him put his hands on his thighs, stroking, comforting.

One of him laughed, a breathless half-laugh, and they grinned at each other, feeling closer than they had when they'd been one person, which was silly.

He lay down beside himself. He didn't care if they got stuck together when the come dried.

"So. D'you think...?" one of him asked.

The other considered. "Prob'ly just narcissism," he said after a moment.

"Yeah. We're not... that. We're just irresistible."

"Even to ourselves."

"So why doesn't Evans like us then?" It felt odd to be talking about Evans after having sex with... not someone else, precisely, but having sex with not-her.

"Oh, she likes us. She just doesn't want to admit it because then she'd have to admit to being wrong."

A pause, and then, because they were both thinking it, "Reckon she'd be up for a threesome?"

They considered the possibility, and decided that while Evans would not be up for it, the warm glow they each got from the idea meant they still loved her, so they were definitely not _that_.

Except they were both a little hard again, and James knew he wouldn't turn himself down if he suggested another go.

"James? D'you think it's possible to be both?"

"What, bent and straight at the same time?"

"Yeah." Stupid idea.

"I reckon not, or everyone would be. Who'd turn down sex that good?"

There was some point of logic eluding them, he felt, but his lips wrapped around his cock and he decided logic could go hang.


End file.
